From the humor files of the world wide web!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
I found these answers all over the net and in my easily-amused mind they are hilarious. I picked my favourite ones and I hope you like!
It didn't. I was playing golf with it at the time.
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.
Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll find out.
I deduce this was a Rock Island hen, eleven months old, and that it was kept in a mesh cage composed of galvanized iron. Surely Watson, you can see this is a festive Sunday afternoon, and the chicken is but one step ahead of the family stew pot.
To live deliberately ... and suck all the marrow out of life.
Look, it's tough crossin' the road. The chicken knows it's tough. The American people have got to understand that I know the chicken knows it's tough. I read the report. But the chicken's on the march. And it will get the job done .
Whyyy...did the chicken, cross the road?
*thumps podium*
He crossed the road... to give his life.
He did it,... not for himself,.......... but he did it... for his fellow chickens.
As a warning,...
And a brave and noble thing it was... that he did.
Jack Sheppard: I don't know, maybe the chicken was just moving in that direction. Why does it have to mean anything that it crossed the road?
John Locke: The Island demanded that the chicken cross at that moment.
Sawyer: Why are you so interested in the damn chicken, Colonel Sanders? Tired of mangos?
Sayid, calmly: I know more about chickens and the use of them crossing roads than I care to remember. I don't know what is more disturbing. The fact that that chicken has crossed the road, or that it has only three toes.
Early Shannon: Ohmygod Boone, why should we care if the chicken crossed the road or not? It has nothing to do with us.
Hugo "Hurley" Reyes: Dude, did you see a chicken come this way?
Neo, there is no chicken.
Now off with you to the comment section and come up with your own answer. I´ll go first :)
I found these answers all over the net and in my easily-amused mind they are hilarious. I picked my favourite ones and I hope you like!
It didn't. I was playing golf with it at the time.
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.
Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll find out.
I deduce this was a Rock Island hen, eleven months old, and that it was kept in a mesh cage composed of galvanized iron. Surely Watson, you can see this is a festive Sunday afternoon, and the chicken is but one step ahead of the family stew pot.
To live deliberately ... and suck all the marrow out of life.
Look, it's tough crossin' the road. The chicken knows it's tough. The American people have got to understand that I know the chicken knows it's tough. I read the report. But the chicken's on the march. And it will get the job done .
Whyyy...did the chicken, cross the road?
*thumps podium*
He crossed the road... to give his life.
He did it,... not for himself,.......... but he did it... for his fellow chickens.
As a warning,...
And a brave and noble thing it was... that he did.
Jack Sheppard: I don't know, maybe the chicken was just moving in that direction. Why does it have to mean anything that it crossed the road?
John Locke: The Island demanded that the chicken cross at that moment.
Sawyer: Why are you so interested in the damn chicken, Colonel Sanders? Tired of mangos?
Sayid, calmly: I know more about chickens and the use of them crossing roads than I care to remember. I don't know what is more disturbing. The fact that that chicken has crossed the road, or that it has only three toes.
Early Shannon: Ohmygod Boone, why should we care if the chicken crossed the road or not? It has nothing to do with us.
Hugo "Hurley" Reyes: Dude, did you see a chicken come this way?
Neo, there is no chicken.Now off with you to the comment section and come up with your own answer. I´ll go first :)
Labels: jokes
29 Comments:
Dick Cheney: "I missed another one?"
Lisa: Because it wanted to!
(I'm not much for quoting others!) :-)
Angelina Jolie: So I can adopt it.
lisa, shocking! :) You know what, this might be the truest answer of them all.
goldennib, nice! I wonder what she´d call it!
Ambrose Bierce:
Chicken, n. A flightless biped with the yellow on the outside.
Cross, v.t. To liberate oneself from conventional thinking and notice.
Other, adj. Of unacknowledged paternity.
Side, n. The aspect from which the opposed lies before and the betrayed behind.
Road, n. A well-worn path from disenchantment to disappointment.
The chicken crossed the road for the same reason men do, to be reminded of home.
I love the Neo one.
Sigh. Must I remind everyone: to get to the other side.
Yeesh. Not that hard.
Britney Spears: Because there was a big cock on the other side.
Doug, I loved that....to be reminded of home:)
"Of unacknowledged paternity"...I know my mother ( all that can be disputed) but not my father...hence I became not quite a chicken, but a flightless poultry nontheless :)
Jenna, I loved that one too. I would have added: "Neo, there is no chicken...follow the rabbit you imbecile!"
TLP, LOL...thatw as almost nasty :) Liked it!
Anyone in Pamplona: Because the bulls were after him.
these are just too funny, and so are the comments!
theresa, that was mighty Spanish of you :) Loved it!
ariel, I agree...it´s a good round for this blog :)
Oxford English Dictionary:"To BOLDLY go, where no chicken has gone before!"
He got tired of Waiting for Godot?
It's late, I just needed to drop in and say hi to my friends. I'll come back when I'm rested :)
Haha, that Goldennib.
G, well right back at you. xox
And I like "He got tired of waiting for Godot!"
Actually, the chicken crossed the road to avoid being run over by Paris Hilton.
Elsku Minka min! Hvenaer aetlar thu koma til Austur? Eg tharf ad tala vid thig!!! ;-)
I think Morpheus should have said," There is no road." It's not a huge difference... unless you're a Matrix Warshowski Zen Geek Freak!
Yeah I know, bad excuse for nothing original to say.
Theresa, Paris has found God now, she deserves all our support. Amen!
Heike, elsku knúsidullan mín. Það er bara svo mikið að gera akkúrat núna. Ég kem austur um helgina, þá getum við spjallað í alla nótt!
Morgan, big party last night? It´s ok...rest some.
There was a "dansk peber" hot salmiak on the other side?
Mom
Travis Bickle (Robert Dinero's character in Taxi Driver): You callin' me chicken? You callin' me chicken? You callin' ME chicken?? Well I'm the only one here. so you must be callin' me chicken. Who the cluck do you think you're callin' chicken? Oh yeah? OK.
sorry, that film was on earlier today, and, well, i'm in a "mood". SURE WISH i'd seen this fine and HILARIOUS post earlier my dear friend... goodness knows i coulda used a good laugh yesterday! sigh. ; ) xox
Mom, :) That is so you. I could get you to cross anything, if I put a salmiak on teh other side:)
neva, well...it is good to laugh, any day really. I enjoyed this post very much. And I loved all these comments.
Because you called him chicken?
She has acted in movie in Italian, French and English including Lola, Justine and La Dolce Vida.
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Neo: I am the chicken.
Trinity: Then, I'll cross the road with you.
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Here in the south, chickens never make it across the road. We wring their necks, pluck them, and have them in the boiler pot before they can even think of crossing the road. :-)
asgeir, look who´s back :) I missed you, still in Reykjavik? Mom told me she saw you at Boksala Studenta a while back...
Doug, has she? that´s wonderful! Should I send some flowers?
Jamie, I used to live on a chicken farm way back when young (er) and your descriptions so feels like home. Despite that, I hate to eat egg nowadays.
First of all, I don't you can galvanize iron. Sherlock is wrong! I think you can only galvanize steel. But I'm too lazy to Google it, so this will have to do.
Very funny answers! I loved Grandpa's the best.
Fowl purposes.
gawpo, I like drandpa, too!
alan, most likely!
I thought it was too cold for Chickens in Iceland?
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